give me more of this, it's got a flavor to it

it hurts to know that my dreams will never get anywhere.
to feel like my heart pours out for nothing, that this
ink spilling onto the page, is invisible, that
it will evaporate before it is even remembered.

but, such is life, i suppose to myself,
as i fall back into my work-sleep-eat routine that seems to eat up the weeks and spit them back out in the form of
a little blue number on my ATM slip

i barely taste the food going down my throat, and
yes i thank God for where i am, and
i really mean it too! but,
i still want more! i'm tired of this already! i want
growth, change, adventure, excitement! and
it's not here, it's never completely here,
the finish keeps moving! and,
maybe, that's the whole entire point.
goad, bait-switch, reward
behaviour to encourage
growth